Ronda Rousey is the new SmackDown Women’s
Champion! Edge vs Finn Balor turns into MUMMY WAR! And most importantly, the copyright logo misdirect
from NXT TakeOvers was called up to the main roster! Which was for the WWE return of Bray Wyatt. Which I guess was a pretty big deal. I’m Oli Davis and this is my review of WWE
Extreme Rules 2022… in about ten minutes. Before I get into that, though, give us a
subscribe and enable notifications to always on for all the latest backstage news and wrestling
reviews. Aka, LET ME IN. That would be really nice thank you great
you won’t regret it. After an opening video package that felt like
Paul Heyman had kidnapped a child and forced them to spell the word Extreme, and a teasing
graphic of a video game white rabbit hopping down a hole, this premium live event opened
on my most anticipated match of the show: Imperium vs the Brawling Brutes. This is one of those feuds that would have
been absolutely terrible under Vince McMahon, laden with lazy stereotyping, lame comedy
and built around: ‘I’m Irish and I wear a little hat’ vs ‘I’m a vague assortment
of German and Austrian, and we like rules’.
But in Triple H’s hands, this feud has been
booked how it was supposed to be. Gunther and Sheamus chopping the s*** out
of each other. Apart from the shillelagh occasionally being
used, the Donnybrook stipulation was mostly just barrels and bar set dressing. These guys really didn’t need weapons because
they have Gunther’s massive hands. Just like their Clash at the Castle singles
encounter, which really brought this feud to life, the crowd were incredibly into the
stiff-slapping action.
And avenging losing his second Intercontinental
title shot from SmackDown, Sheamus put Gunther through the commentary table, and then won
with a Brogue Kick on Vinci. These two teams could feud forever, and I’m
not sure I would ever get bored. I don’t think I could say the same for Liv
Morgan and Ronda Rousey, and I’m hoping both can move on from each other now after
their several month feud. Liv has unfortunately been one of the few
acts that feels worse off in the new regime. She’s struggled to ever pose a credible
threat to Rousey, despite being the champion, and that continued here. They worked hard, but a lot of the story was
based around no-selling baseball bat shots – Sting would be furious – and Liv needing
a weapon, while Ronda was just content to use her fighting skills.
That’s a tough dynamic for the babyface
to be in. Neither badass or competent. WWE pay-per-view finishes have improved significantly
as of late though, and there was enough intrigue to hopefully set up better directions for
them moving forward. Liv hit a senton through the table, but Ronda
kicked out into a Bicep Crusher, making Morgan pass out with what looked like a smile on
her face. Perhaps this signals the start of a character
reset for Morgan, the extreme stipulation unlocking something more unhinged within her,
more like the Harley Quinn-style character she had in her Riott Squad days. Karrion Kross wouldn’t put the strap on
for his match against Drew McIntyre, giggity. Drew forced his fist through the hole though,
the match got underway, built to Drew’s kip-up comeback template, had a really intense
whipping exchange, but then Scarlett stopped Drew’s Claymore with pepper spray. A far more dependable attack than pyromancy,
which as I know from Full Metal Alchemist, can take decades to perfect. Kross winning was the right result, otherwise
he’d be dead in the water, but this wasn’t the blow away match to cement him as one of
SmackDown’s top heels.
After we were shown Nikkita Lyons in the crowd. Shots of soon to be debuting wrestlers in
the crowd to the main roster confirmed. We got Bayley vs Bianca Belair, in WWE’s
first ever ladder match for a women’s singles title. Belair’s offensive style is tailor made
to introduce ladders into, with her combination of incredible athleticism and strength, while
Bayley played the perfect foil, her heel persona cutting off Bianca’s high spots. Damage CTRL got involved at the point Bianca
was first going to win, because of course they did. How would Belair get out of this? Actually it’s going to be super easy. Barely an inconvenience. Sky and Kai proved utterly ineffectual, with
Belair, someone who’d just wrestled for twelve or so minutes with brutal ladder spots,
immediately beating them up and delivering a double KOD. It would’ve been ok if that then led to
a Bayley victory, but that didn’t happen either, with Belair hitting a very impressive
KOD onto her onto a ladder, and then climbing up to win.
This was a very decent match, but one of the
few on this card that leaves me indifferent to where these characters go next. Belair is still the invincible, increasingly
one-dimensional champion. And Damage CTRL can no longer be taken as
a serious threat. But then came my match of the night. The 30 minute soap opera – actually the same
length as an episode of Eastenders – of Finn Balor vs Edge. The first half was actually a bit naff. It was annoyingly one of those I Quit matches
where the referee holds the microphone up for every spot. Even right from the start of the match, in
the first submission spot about a minute in. Those should be saved for when the match really
might end. It’s like starting immediately on near falls. It also meant the intensity of the wrestling
was constantly peppered with Balor and Edge grunting and heavy breathing, and going no
and never’ throughout. But then, thankfully, came all of the tea. Did I use the slang tea here correctly? Balor started to say I Quit, which brought
out Damien and Dom for the save, and Edge speared them all off the apron.
Amazing. But then Rhea handcuffed Edge to the top rope. Oh she knows exactly what she’s doing simp. And Edge looked down the hardcam accepting
the beatdown fate. Tragedy! But Rey Mysterio then ran down for the save. But Dom took him out to great heat. Oedipal fight! Then Beth Phoenix took Dom out and squared
off against Rhea Ripley. MUMMY FIGHT! Then Edge, now on top again, kicked Dom in
the balls as his Clash at the Castle receipt, hit three spears on Finn, but Rhea brass knuckle
punched Phoenix out. Maybe Edge isn’t winning! Finn hit three coup de graces to even out
the finishers, and forced Edge to say I quit by threatening a conchairto on his unconscious
wife.
